• Listing Your Way to Efficiency

    Checklists are the greatest way to get organized for any occasion. Most of us make a grocery list before going to the store, why not make a list for everything else in life? The benefits greatly outweigh the time that it may take to make one. The more checklists that you make, the quicker you will get at it. Following is some general ideas for checklists:

    Checklist for everyday

    Start your mornings by making a list of all the things that you need to accomplish each day. Carry it with you and mark each item off when completed. This will give a great feeling of accomplishment and closure.

    Household maintenance

    Develop a household maintenance list divided into months. Every month may have a day to change the filter on your central air unit. Check the list a few months in advance to see if you need to schedule specific maintenance people to do a job for you.

    Weekly cleaning list

    A weekly cleaning list should be developed and hung on the wall for everyone to see. Beside each job include the person’s name that is accountable for the job that week. Make sure they mark off the job when completed.

    Car Maintenance checklist

    Schedule times when you need to make appointments for an oil change and general car maintenance.

    Developing checklists for your life will go a long way in reducing stress. Having a list will also make it easier to assign tasks to other people in your household. The great thing about these checklists is they can all be stored on your computer and printed out as needed. Or if you prefer, create a special binder for all of your checklists. Once you start making checklists, you will wonder how you ever lived without them.

  • Adolescent Depression

    Adolescent depression or teenage depression is a disorder that occurs during the teenage years characterized by constant sadness, loss of self-worth, discouragements, and loss of interest in normal activities. Adolescent depression can be a passing response to many situations and stresses and depressed mood is common because of the normal maturation process, the stress connected with it, the influence of sex hormones, and the “independence” differences with parents.

    Adolescent depression can also be a response to a disturbing event, such as breakup of girlfriend or boyfriend, death of a friend or relative, or failure at school. Teenagers who have low self-confidence are highly self-critical and feel a little sense of control over negative incidents, and they are specifically at risk to becoming depressed when they go through stressful experiences.

    Real depression in teenagers is most of the time difficult to identify because their normal behavior is marked by both up and down moods, with irregular periods of feeling “the world is a great place” and “life sucks”. These types of mood may alternate over a period of hours or days.

    Unrelenting depressed moods, failing relationship with family and friends, uncertain school performance, substance abuse, and other negative behavior may signify a serious depressive episode. These symptoms maybe identified easily but adolescent depression often manifests very diversely than these classic symptoms of depression.

    Too much sleeping, change in eating habits, and even criminal behavior such as shoplifting, may be signs of depression. Another common warning sign of adolescent depression is an obsession with death that may take the form of either fears about death and dying or suicidal thoughts.

    About fifteen to twenty percent of American teens have experienced a severe episode of depression, which is like the percentage of adults suffering from depression. Long-term depressive disorder generally has its beginning in the young adult years.

    Adolescent girls are twice as prone to experience depression. Contributing risk factors include stressful life events such as child abuse, both physical and sexual; loss of a parent to death or divorce; chronic illness; unstable care-giving, poor social skills; and family history of depression. It is also linked with eating disorders.

    Symptoms of adolescent depression include:

    • Temper or agitation
    • Depressed or irritable mood
    • Reduced pleasure in daily activities
    • Inability to enjoy activities which used to be enjoyable
    • Excessive daytime sleepiness
    • Change in appetite
    • Usually loss of appetite but sometimes an increase
    • Change in weight
    • Unintentional weight gain or loss
    • Fatigue
    • Difficulty making decisions
    • Preoccupation with self
    • Difficulty concentrating
    • Acting-out behavior
    • Excessive or inappropriate feelings of guilt
    • Memory loss episodes
    • Feelings of worthlessness
    • Self-hatred or sadness
    • Excessive irresponsible behavior pattern
    • And plans to commit suicide or actual suicide attempt.

    If symptoms are continuing for at least two weeks and cause considerable sorrow or difficulty functioning, treatment should be sought. Treatments are similar to those of depressed adults and include psychotherapy and antidepressant medications. Seeking professional help for suitable treatment is required.

  • 3 Ways to Advance Your Goals

    1. WORK WITH THE END IN MIND

    Beginning with the end in mind is the endowment of imagination . If you are the programmer, write the program, says, goal expert – Stephen R. Covey. Goals help us to focus, and the quality of our attention is enhanced by a having a project so cool and interesting that we can’t help but make a leap. Let’s say, you want to organize your workspace so that everyone is inspired to do their best work. The in-between steps: like ergonomic concerns & planning comfortable lighting, in-and-of itself can seem mundane, but joined together they name a bigger accomplishment and by doing so, asks us to spice up our expectations & upgrade who we are.

    Focus on success & keep in mind how you want things to end up. And soon enough you’ll be successful.

    • Name the accomplishment
    • Give your project a title
    • What needs to be done by when
    • How would you like things to end up
    • Identify upbeat reasons for pursuing the goal

    2. RAISE THE BAR

    Define greatness, challenge the limits, double the goal, or try something new. These are just some of the sentiments that put our plans into action and move us towards revolutionary results. Look around and witness the very essence of commonplace activities being tested and re-imagined. Such as schools re-defining Physical Education by bringing in activities ranging from kickboxing to more esoteric offerings like tai chi and yoga.

    And with the introduction of Blogs, an international conversation is in full swing with millions of links and a central clearing house inspired by immediacy, intrigue and tension. Raising the bar on a project can simply mean taking one extra step, having an allegiance to a weird idea, or devoting to a regular practice.

    Commit to a goal in a meaningful way, personalize it & make it your own, and then watch an otherwise sleepy project wake up and give way to a new found energy, creativity and distinction. Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.

    • Double the goal
    • Challenge the limits
    • Create a regular practice
    • Raise your standards,values or beliefs
    • Make it a game

    3. GO THE PATH OF LEAST RESISTANCE

    Sometimes a goal deserves a break. Time Magazine reported that after 8 hours of sleep you’d be more than twice as likely to find a shortcut for solving a problem. Suggesting that taking it easy is good for the brain, and what’s good for the brain is good for the overall psyche and soul.

    Are you doing too much, not getting nourished and being exhausted? Well perhaps its time to consider another path. Don’t re-invent the wheel. Pick up a book written by an expert, join a group that’s geared around your project, sign up for an informational newsletter , or ask someone to buddy up & help. For instance, if I was writing a screen-play and struggling with a self imposed deadline, I could simplify my project just by signing up for a writing class. Working with weekly writing tasks & in-class exercises alone would expedite the development of my script.

    Another over looked shortcut is to consider smaller steps. The smaller the increments, the easier the goal. Deng Ming-Dao, writes in Everyday Tao An inch in one direction, then an inch in another already makes a span of 2 inches. Gradually we can improve on that. Go the path of least resistance, it’s a gift of energy.

    • Don’t reinvent the wheel-find someone who’s done it before
    • Slow down or change the pace
    • Keep to minimum daily standards
    • Write everything down–loose ideas vs. lost ideas
    • The smaller the increments the easier the goal

    BONUS RESOURCE: Staying Motivated

    Staying motivated and keeping others motivated is a big but essential task. Learn how to beat the lifelong process of continuously motivating by adapting a new perspective of what is motivation. Here is the resource to find it out:

  • 12 Dirty Habits That Prevent You From Developing Exceptional People Skills

    Chances are, if you’re not very successful at dealing with people, you haven’t had the chance to properly educate yourself. Learning to deal with people is like learning to walk except it requires a lot more work!

    Now imagine if your whole life you had been taught to walk backwards. Would this make your life much more difficult? Of course it would. Just like anything else, you need to learn exactly how to interact with people the proper way.

    Here we go: here are the 12 dirty habits you should always avoid when interacting with people.

    Dirty Habit #1 – Looking down at the floor when speaking to someone

    You must learn to look at someone directly in their eyes when speaking to them. If you were taught that staring at people was impolite, you’re absolutely right. However, this does not mean you can’t look at someone in his or her eyes.

    Dirty Habit #2 – Slouching when you’re standing or sitting down

    Stand up straight. In our society, being tall is a good thing. When you slouch you appear much shorter. Not only will standing straight make you look taller but it will also give you a confident look.

    Dirty Habit #3 –Frowning and not smiling enough

    No one likes to spend time with someone who’s in a bad mood. If you’re not feeling too great then try to keep your distance. People love to spend time with upbeat, optimistic people. Make an effort to smile, not frown.

    Dirty Habit #4 – Avoiding strangers

    Since the day you were born, your parents have taught you never to speak to strangers. Well, you’re a grown up now and things have changed. In order to develop exceptional people skills you need to be comfortable speaking to all types of people. You need to meet as many people as you can.

    Dirty Habit #5 – Making a poor first impression

    Did you know that people will judge almost everything about you just by your first impression? Make an initial effort to get along with the person you are meeting and you’ll save yourself a lot of trouble in the future.

    Dirty Habit #6 – Not making an effort to speak well

    In order to develop great people skills you need to become a great conversationalist. This doesn’t mean you need to speak a lot; this means you need to speak well. You need to articulate and choose your words wisely. Basically, you need to listen to what you’re saying and not just blabber on about whatever you feel like.

    Dirty Habit #7 – Not being a good listener

    Have you ever noticed how you tend to fall into a mind drift as soon as the other person begins to speak? Okay, well if you really don’t care about the person, then fine. But if you do, make an effort to listen and let the person speak. It will only help you further on in the conversation.

    Dirty Habit #8 – Not staying in touch with your acquaintances

    To make sure you have the best relationships with all of the people you know, you must stay in touch with them. You need to regularly check your contact list and remind them all that you still exist. I’m not saying to call them up twice a week but an occasional check up is always nice.

    Dirty Habit #9 – Not being proactive

    When there is not enough action and things are looking dull, it’s up to you to make a move. If you aren’t satisfied with the current situation don’t blame others, do something about it! Let’s face it: no one really cares if you’re unhappy, except maybe your mom…

    Dirty Habit #10 – Not enjoying your social life

    If you want people to enjoy your company, you need to let them know that you’re a fun person to spend time with. If you’re a hard worker, then I congratulate you! However, you need to occasionally go out and be known for your excellent night outs! Go out and live your life to the fullest!

    Dirty Habit #11 – Not facing your fears

    Actually, this relates to all aspects of your life but in this context I’m talking about meeting new people, career promotions, etc. If you need to do something logical but your emotions are getting in the way, then you need to analyze the situation and use some common sense.

    Dirty Habit #12 – Refusing to be open minded

    There are all kinds of people out there. There are different religions, different races, different cultures, and different languages. Learn to accept others for who they are not who you want them to be. Give them your full respect and work out your differences unless of course you aren’t receiving the respect you deserve.

    There you go! 12 dirty habits to always avoid if you really want to develop exceptional people skills! If you’re prepared to learn if you carry the people skills traits or how to develop them in your personality, get your handwriting analysis today.

  • Is Your Personality Causing You Stress?

    It may sound hard to believe, but experts say that your personality can actually cause you stress.  To a certain extent, your personality might have been determined at birth.  However, there are certain characteristics that you might have developed over the years that are now contributing to your stress level.  While one cannot change his or her personality overnight, it is certainly possible to change certain habits that may now be causing you stress.

    To begin with, you should ask yourself if you have low self-esteem.  Do you feel as if you are inferior to other people?  Do you constantly berate yourself for your faults?  Do you consider yourself to be the sum total of your mistakes?  There is evidence to suggest that low self-esteem can lead to stressful situations.  The problem is that you may be putting stress on yourself unnecessarily.  Therefore, what you need to do is to begin to enhance your self-esteem.  This begins by ending the “negative talk” that goes on inside your head.  Instead of focusing on your weaknesses, form a list of your strengths. 

    You might also want to list all of your major accomplishments.  You might be amazed to discover just how much you have achieved.   Whenever you feel the urge to downgrade yourself, think of your attributes.  This should serve to end the litany of your failures which you may be repeating to yourself.

    Asking meaningful questions to yourself can also lead to discovery of what is affecting you. Discover the 99 questions that can help you realize the superhuman in you reading 99 Questions to Self .

    Stress can also be the result of being overburdened.  Do you take on too much?  Are you dealing with too much responsibility?  While there are certain responsibilities at home, at work, and at school that we must carry, at times we may be overextending ourselves. 

    List your major responsibilities and see if there is a way for you to whittle down the list. You might be surprised to learn just how much you have taken on.  With a little bit of planning, you might be able to shift some of your responsibilities to other members of your household or to your co-workers.  Be sure to talk with your mate and your boss if your stress level seems out of control.  Together, you can work on strategies to reduce the amount of stress you feel.     

    Let’s face it.  Some of us are control freaks.  We feel as if we need to control every detail within our line of sight.  If you fall into this category, you may be experiencing stress because of your controlling nature.  You may also find that this weakness is negatively impacting your personal life, causing you to feel additional stress in your relationships.

    In order to combat this tendency, try practicing the old adage, “Let Go”.  Recognize that there are certain things that are simply beyond your control.  The sooner you recognize this, the better off you’ll be, and the less stress you will feel. 

    Another prime cause of stress is fear, especially fear of the unknown.  You may be fearful of making mistakes or of being judged harshly.  In order to counteract this, you must recognize that everyone commits errors—even major league baseball players!  You must also learn to forgive yourself for your faults—otherwise, you will be putting yourself under a tremendous amount of stress.  Follow the motto:  Do your best and let nature take care of the rest.  Try not to agonize over every little thing.  In addition, learn to get over the guilt of not being perfect.  Otherwise, your stress level is likely to consistently hit the roof.  

    You have to realize that recognizing your faults is half the battle.  Once you know what personal foibles you need to work on, you’ll be in a better position to reduce your stress.  Realize that it took you a long time to develop such personality flaws, so it might take some time to eliminate them.  In other words, don’t expect to radically change your personality in a week.   However, with the proper amount of diligence, you can alter those aspects of your personality that are causing you grief.   Once you eliminate these flaws, you should feel more energetic, less stressed, and better able to take on the world.  And you may just find your blood pressure decreasing as well.

  • Anger Management Therapy

    Anger management programs offer the individual plenty of information regarding techniques and strategies for dealing with anger. Is there anger management therapy available for those who feel the need to take their treatment a step further?

    In the early 1970’s, a psychiatrist named Aaron T. Beck, M.D, developed an anger management therapy focusing on problem-solving. This therapy initially called Cognitive Therapy is now also known as Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy or CBT. Beck worked with patients for years using his psychiatric knowledge but was burdened to see his patient’s treatment making only slow progress. Beck wanted to use a more intense approach to anger management therapy.

    Cognitive Therapy is a form of anger management therapy which helps a person to correct or change specific details in their thinking. These details, involving negative feelings, will likely lead to anger and cause behavioral problems.

    Beck realized that it is during the thinking process, negative thoughts are formed which lead to changes in emotions and behavior. If an individual could be treated at this stage, helping them to change their way of thinking, then they would see changes in their emotions and behavioral pattern.

    Using strategies and techniques such as relaxation training and assertiveness training, CBT has proven to be a relatively fast method of providing an individual with relief and allowing them to experience freedom through endurance.

    Cognitive Therapy has proven to be the most effective type of psychological treatment. Its popularity has spread worldwide and is used by many qualified professionals to treat individuals with behavioral difficulties such as anger. Literature about CBT is widely available and there is training in CBT provided for professionals.

    Many people who suffer with anger-related issues avoid therapy. Some think they don’t need it and others see it as a sign of weakness. The opposite can actually be said of an individual who seeks anger management therapy. They are strong and determined, willing to take whatever measures necessary to make positive changes in their life.

    When a person gets to the point where they can admit they need anger management therapy, it is essential to find a therapist who makes them feel comfortable. It is important to be able to communicate easily with a therapist since this is the person who will help reshape the individual’s life. Building a trusting relationship with their therapist is vital when an individual is committed to therapy, no matter how long it takes.

    Being able to share emotions, whether good or bad, is important in anger management therapy. It is through sharing and trusting that a person begins to discover things about themselves. Once these discoveries are revealed, an individual will begin to work on making changes in their thoughts and emotions which will lead to positive changes in their lives.

    Anger management therapy may seem tough initially but with a trusting therapist, an individual will certainly make progress. This relationship between the individual and their therapist provides a safety zone, a place where they can feel free to disclose their innermost thoughts and inhibitions. Exploring underlying feelings of these thoughts will eventually provide the tools necessary for success.

    Anger management therapy, either CBT or meeting regularly with a therapist, is definitely beneficial for people striving to work through anger-related issues. Choosing anger management therapy is a big step and requires the support and encouragement from family and friends.

  • The Social Killer

    Scared to go out to a meeting to speak to a client? Need to deliver a speech but feel like fainting at the thought of going in front of the class to present? Scared to attend a social gathering for no apparent reason? You might be suffering from social anxiety disorder.

    Social anxiety disorder, also known as social phobia, is a kind of mental disorder where the sufferer experiences a severe or unreasonable fear of social gatherings where there is a possibility that one may get embarrassed or ridiculed. Most of the time, these anxieties arise from an intense fear of being closely watched or scrutinized – from the simple things like the way they dress, talk or act; to important job functions like performing in front of a crowd, giving a presentation, or finishing an interview for a job application.

    This kind of phobia gives sufferers a feeling of being trapped or shut away from the world. They say social anxiety disorder is closely related to shyness. However social phobia differs in the sense that this disrupts normal socializing functions. It is true that everyone goes through a stage of shyness in their life, overcoming it is a different thing. When it becomes too much that it interrupts your daily life and relationships to the point where you are sick with worry, it is time to seek counsel.

    It is good to know the signs and symptoms of social anxiety disorder to be able to determine and treat this said condition before it worsens. People with social phobia manifest 2 basic kinds of symptoms: emotional and physical.

    The emotional symptoms include: an intense fear of being in situations in which you don’t know people, fear of situations in which you may be judged, worrying about embarrassing or humiliating yourself, fear that others will notice that you look anxious, anxiety that disrupts your daily routine, work, school or other activities, avoiding doing things or speaking to people out of fear of embarrassment, avoiding situations where you might be the center of attention.

    The physical symptoms include: Blushing, profuse sweating, trembling or shaking, nausea, stomach upset, difficulty talking, shaky voice, muscle tension, confusion, palpitations, diarrhea, cold and clammy hands, and difficulty making eye contact.

    Basically, this phobia manifests a symptom of being overly anxious around other people. Sufferers think that other people are more confident that they are, that other people are better them. They feel uncomfortable being around people that it makes it difficult for them to eat, drink, work, asking questions, asking for dates, even going to the toilet, when other people are around.

    The good news is that there is a cure for this condition.

    For the past 20 years, a combination of talk therapy and medications has proven most helpful to limit the effects, if not cure, this mental condition. Certain anti-depressants (Paroxetine, Sertraline and Venlafaxine), anti-anxiety medications, and beta blockers are used to help Socio-phobic people to balance certain chemicals in the brain and minimize panic attacks during periods of heightened anxiety.

    Talk therapy teaches people with social anxiety disorder to react differently to situations that trigger their anxiety. The therapist helps the patient confront the negative feelings about social situations and the fear about being judged by others.

    Patients learn how their thinking patterns add to the symptoms of social anxiety disorder and how to change their thinking so the symptoms begin to lessen.

    To be shy is quite normal, everybody has gone through a similar phase. Getting past that stage is the difficult part. Ultimately, it ends up to building your confidence to a certain level for you to be comfortable enough to move normally. In case you’ve been diagnosed as a socio-phobic, it is nothing to be ashamed of. With a little bit of therapy, proper medication, and enough support from people who believe in you, you’ll slowly be able to socialize and function normally within a group without being too anxious.

  • 6 Ways to Pinpoint Your Perfect Career

    Have you ever felt stuck in your career? Employee stress and burn out can account for a lot of dissatisfaction in your life. After all, you are at work some 8 hours a day or more. That’s 1/3 of your day if you don’t count sleep. That’s a long time to be dissatisfied.

    If you feel stuck, here are 6 great ways to find your ideal career:

    1. Brainstorm on a sheet of paper

    I’ve talked about this before and it’s a strategy I use all the time. Take a pad of paper and write down at the top your objective in question form. Then, simply list out 20 answers to your question. For example, you could write “What should I be doing with my time and life?” Then stay seated for a half hour to an hour coming up with answers to that question. The key to this exercise is coming up with 20 answers – don’t quit until you have 20 answers. You can repeat every day until you get the answer you seek.

    2. Ask 3 close friends

    Sometimes our friends know us better than ourselves. While meeting with one of your friends, mention you are at a crossroads in your life and career. Ask what they think you’d enjoy doing. You might be surprised at how easily they can zero in to your strengths and abilities and report a perfect job area.

    3. Ask your boss and coworkers

    Much like your friends in the example above, your boss and coworkers most likely see you in a way you do not see yourself. In fact, they are likely most familiar with your strengths and weaknesses in the work environment. Compile all the answers you get from them and see if there are any common threads you can explore.

    4. Call a headhunter

    If you are searching in your career, it’s likely you have a resume. Sometimes you can catch a headhunter or recruiter during their slow times and meet with them to pick through what you might be good at. People seem open to talking with people. After all, if you don’t get paid, they don’t either.

    5. Take a career assessment test

    There are several sites on the Internet that might be able to take one of these tests for a fee. But using my ‘headhunter’ tip above, many headhunters have this software and don’t mind you taking the test in their office. They ask you to answer a series of questions about what you are good at, what you like to do, what you prefer doing over what you don’t. If you take one, you will likely see some new exciting areas to explore in your life.

    6. Keep a journal

    Do you keep a journal? If so, read through, looking for common threads in your writing. Keep your eyes peeled for trends and activities you like as well as don’t like. In fact, finding examples of what you don’t like and what frustrates you is almost as important as finding what you do like. For example, if you hate an overwhelming boss, you’d probably like a self-directed position. If you hate nosy coworkers you’d probably prefer your own office.

    Discovering what you really want to do with your life is the most important decision you can make. We spend 1/3 or more of our lives at work. So figuring out the right career is important to keeping that 1/3 of our lives happy and productive.

  • How to deal with failure in your life

    There are different ways that people deal with their feelings of failure. It is hard to deal with all the pressures that we go through these days and it is sometimes a little frustrating too. There are all kinds of ways to take on the challenges of failure and the one thing that many need to realize is that it can be done and there is no reason to get too worked up over it all.

    First you have to identify the feelings that you are having. Are you feeling failure and having depression at the same time? If so you need to work through these issues and figure out how to make it right. You need to try and find a way to get through the failure and get past it to a better and more appreciated type of feeling. After that then you can clarify how you are really feeling and what is making you feel as if you have failed at something.

    You need to talk about your feelings of failure. You have to work through these issues and try and decide what is making you feel just this way. There are plenty of people that you can discuss these feelings with. Talking it out with a friend or a family member is the one way that you can make these feelings subside. Talking is always a good way to overcome any type of problem that you may have. It is always better to get it out than keep it all bottled in.

    The worst thing that you can do when you are dealing with feelings of failure is to get worked up. You do not want to act out and make wrong choices that are only going to make your situation worse. You do not want to do something that you may regret later on in life. You need to control your inner reactions. Calm down and decide to work out your feelings and not use them to create move havoc or problems.

    The one thing that you have to keep in mind is that all things pass. Remember that if something is not going right and you are having a hard time dealing with the pressures you need to think that in a short time it will pass on and you will not remember what you were so worked up over. Sharing your feelings and getting to relieve the stress that you are building up can really make a positive difference and help you to achieve your goals at being a more successful and happier person.

    Know who you are and find something that makes you feel good. Having the failure feelings subside is something that you can do for yourself so that you are not losing control and making more out of it than what the problem really is. There is no reason why you have to live with these feelings and go through pain. You should take these above steps and use positive reactions and thinking when you are dealing with any type of depression and failure issues. It can all be worked out in the end as long as you are willing to open up and not let yourself self-destruct.

    Success can be yours as long as you fight off the failure and let yourself move on to better goals. After you see that life has so much more to offer you, there is nothing that you cannot try and do. You are going to be glad that you made these choices and dealt with the feelings of failure that can come from just about anything that we do these days. Getting on with life and being a wonderful success is something that we can definitely feel good about.

  • 3 Categories Women Put You In Before You Meet

    When approaching women, even before you have said a word or done anything, she has already unconsciously put you into one of three categories:

    I Like Him

    I Don’t Like Him

    Undecided

    Now that you are aware of the three different categories lets go over each ones strengths and weaknesses for you.

    Category #1 – I like Him:

    If you happen to look or remind her of someone that she liked, dress in a certain type of way that she finds attractive or anything else that she happens to connect with. Congrats you have a heads up on everyone and when it comes to taking it to the next level its all On You. This is a great thing and if you fall in the Average Guy category expect this to happen with around 10 percent of the women that you meet who are available.

    Category #2 – I Don’t Like Him:

    You ever meet someone and for no apparent or real good reason you don’t like them?

    Guess what, women are the same way and for good measure most women throw unconfident men and a whole slew of petty reasons in there as well. If you fall in this category and at least 10 percent of the time you will if you are just an average guy, unless you have some unknown outside factor to enhance you (hot ex still after you, famous, rich, etc.); there is nothing you can say or do that is going to get this woman to change her mind and be attracted to you.

    Category #3: Undecided:

    The majority of the times about 80 percent is you are an average guy you are going to fall in this Category which if you have done your studying and reading on seduction and how to attract women is a perfect place to be. Because as long as you are in the Undecided category you can work on creating the desire and attraction in a woman that you want. This is very good news for you my friend.

    Of course the time is now for you to get your life in order so that when you walk up to a woman that you find to be a potential partner and she is thinking to herself maybe or maybe not over the course of a cup of coffee or tea you can turn that maybe into a yes and increase your success with women tremendously.