Manhardeep Singh

Motivation and Goal Setting

April 20, 2018

If you knew that you could achieve anything you wanted to, maybe get that job that you always thought was slightly out of your reach or find and build that wonderful new relationship which has remained somehow elusive, that would be amazing wouldn’t it?

Keep the thought positive. Don’t get annoyed with yourself for not using the resources before. Focusing on a negative energy will probably prevent you from moving forwards. Focus on what it is that you actually want, the outcome you desire.

All you need is motivation and goal setting.

Goal setting and performance

Goal setting improves performance when:

– Goals are specific
– Goals are difficult
– Goals are Challenging
– Goals are Attainable
– Goals are participatively set
– Goals are most often for individuals, but may also be team/group based

In order to stay motivated, observe the following:

1. Identify your Values, Beliefs and Desires
What is important to you motivates you. This simply means that if you assign a value to something important, you are more likely to do what action is required to reach the goal.

People’s goals and desires grow from their values and beliefs.

Draft a list of your values, beliefs and desires. Take time to think about the interrelations of the items.

The list should be a source of motivation and must help you achieve goals you have set. The quality and depth of your motivation is directly related to your commitment. You must be sure that you can live up to reach the goal you have set.

Taking this for granted could lead to frustration that could diminish your motivation.

2. Do a Self-Assessment

Do an informal assessment of your existing abilities. Have a reflection on what you know about yourself. Accuracy and honesty is essential at this point. Underestimation or overestimation would result from inaccurate assessment of one’s abilities.

If you already have an assessment of your strengths and weaknesses and you know what you value and desire, it is now possible to establish personal goals.

All goals should incorporate these common attributes:

A. Realistic

Goal setting should be realistic. The goals set should be based on your existing abilities and circumstances.

B. Possible

Remember not to establish goals that would make the realistic, unrealistic.

C. Flexible

Always anticipate obstacles along the way and learn how to move around them.

D. Measurable

Have a time frame so you would know if you have reached your goal.

E. Under Control

Remember to set your goals based on your own values and beliefs. Target goals where it is possible for you to control the outcome.

3. Role of Personal Circumstance

You should be in a position to be able to act on the goals you have set. Failure to consider your personal circumstances would impair your motivation and goal setting.

Changing circumstances always influences goals. If your circumstances change but your goals doesn’t adapt it could undermine your motivation.

People are often unwilling to adapt and adjust to the situation. It is hard for them to adjust their self-expectations. There are times when people can get frustrated and lose their motivation.

Motivation and goal setting can be maintained if you would take into account your personal circumstance.

Redefining goals is very important to remain motivated and stay on the path to success.

4. Breeding Success

Personal circumstance, motivation and goal setting affect the outcome of success.

If you failed to reach any of these steps, your motivation will diminish, you would fail to work up to your abilities, and this would dampen your chances of success.
IMPORTANCE OF GOOD CLOTHING

April 19, 2018

First impressions are apt to be permanent; it is therefore of importance that they should be favourable. The dress of an individual is that circumstance from which you first form your opinion of him. It is even more prominent than manner, It is indeed the only thing which is remarked in a casual encounter, or during the first interview. It, therefore, should be the first care.

What style is to our thoughts, dress is to our persons. It may supply the place of more solid qualities, and without it the most solid are of little avail. Numbers have owed their elevation to their attention to the toilet. Place, fortune, marriage have all been lost by neglecting it.

Your dress should always be consistent with your age and your natural exterior. That which looks outr, on one man, will be agreeable on another. As success in this respect depends almost entirely upon particular circumstances and personal peculiarities, it is impossible to give general directions of much importance. We can only point out the field for study and research; it belongs to each one’s own genius and industry to deduce the results. However ugly you may be, rest assured that there is some style of habiliment which will make you passable.

If, for example, you have a stain upon your cheek which rivals in brilliancy the best Chateau-Margout; or, are afflicted with a nose whose lustre dims the ruby, you may employ such hues of dress, that the eye, instead of being shocked by the strangeness of the defect, will be charmed by the graceful harmony of the colours. Every one cannot indeed be an Adonis, but it is his own fault if he is an Esop.

Almost every defect of face may be concealed by a judicious use and arrangement of hair. Take care, however, that your hair be not of one colour and your whiskers of another; and let your wig be large enough to cover the whole of your red or white hair. It is evident, therefore, that though a man may be ugly, there is no necessity for his being shocking.
Finding Time to Organize

April 18, 2018

Finding time to organize is often a complaint used by people. In today’s society, activity is almost non-stop and it IS difficult to see where you can add yet another task to your schedule. However, there are ways, hidden pockets of time, to accomplish things. Below I cover a few of these often overlooked free periods.

FOCUS ON A LITTLE BIT AT A TIME
Rather than thinking about the enormous job at the forefront, split that mission up into controllable tasks. For instance, if you want to organize the boxes in your attic, you may think about going through one box per day, until it’s all complete.

ASK SOMEONE TO BUG YOU
Tell a close friend, relative or co-worker, what you plan to organize, and by what date. Then, merely request that person to bug you a small number of days before to see if you’ve completed it so far. A little outside inspiration is frequently an enormous help.

BRIBE YOURSELF
Make something you love to do, dependent on the achievement of today’s chore. If you promise yourself that you will not watch your favorite television program tonight, unless you work for 15 minutes on organizing your paper piles, you’re sure to get that little task completed. No cheating permitted.

DO NOT SEPARATE EACH PENDING BILL
Whatever you do, don’t put your utility bill in one folder, your car insurance bill in another folder and your membership dues bill in another. All imminent bills should be together in an envelope, pocket folder or basket so they can be paid without having to search several different places to find them.

FIT IN EXERCISE BY MULTI-TASKING
Do some calisthenics or ride a stationary bike while watching your favorite television program. Do some easy stretches, while you’re on the telephone and you’re on hold. Waiting for the washing machine or dryer to finish, or waiting for a computer file to download? Now is a great time for some sit-ups or leg lifts!
Distinguishing of Your Temperament

April 17, 2018

Psychology is a very interesting science. With the help of it’s achievements we can research the hidden corners of our souls. This can be really exciting and even make you discover something new about your personality and traits of your character. You can make numerous tests to determine what will your reaction be to a certain event, how you act in extreme situations, what is your aim that you don’t notice, how well you get along with others. All the above stated questions and the answers you’ll get make up your temperament, a psychological term used to show types of personality by I.P. Pavlov, famous scientist from Russia.

He made a theory of temperament after doing some research on the topic and his theory is proved by experiments. In his personal experience essay and just notes he gives a detailed description of person’s reaction to the same event. You sit peacefully on a bench in the park and read the newspaper. You bought a new cap today, but the day is hot so you put it nearby on the bench and continue to read. You see an old lady approaching. She takes a free seat near you and says nothing, opens a book and reads. Suddenly, it dawns on you that she’s sitting on your new cap. What is your reaction? If you laugh and make jokes to calm the poor granny down you are a sanguine; if you start yelling and your face turns red of the strain and you don’t care about the granny who is probably going to have a heart attack, you are choleric; if you burst into tears and allow the granny to comfort you, you are melancholic; and if you ignore everything including granny’s sitting on your cap and the start of the rain you are a typical phlegmatic. These for types can be described by anybody who makes observations in an experience essay, if you have enough patience to observe your reactions to different situations long enough.

Temperament is not the only field to research and find out new things about you. You may also try to prove Freud’s theory, who says that intellect is completely subjected the passionate nature of a human being and his/her needs. You may see for yourself if you can find “collective unknown” and “individual unknown” which may also be very exciting. Finally, there are a lot of IQ tests that make you understand better in which direction to work to make your mental abilities better. You can not only experiment with yourself but have a friend who is willing to find out something new about his nature. Psychology is still a developing science so that can be a motivator to try your skills in this field professionally. Who knows, maybe you are a born psychiatrist?
Dealing with failure involving money

April 16, 2018

Many people deal with failure when it comes to money. It is not always easy to go on without having a good and stable income. There are plenty of people that have money troubles and are not sure how to deal with the failures that come along with it. It is important to keep a good and open mind that will help relieve the stress so that you can find happiness and success.

You need to make good connections. You have to use your family and friends to talk to and help you through problems like this one. Talking to them and getting their advice is something that can make you feel better about yourself and what you are going through. Accept the support that they are willing to offer because you know these people care a great deal for you and your well being.

Set some good goals for yourself. Taking the smaller steps and dealing with the tasks one at a time is something that will be a great help. You do not want to take on too much at one time. You want to set goals for yourself that are going to make you feel good about whom you are and what you do. When it comes to money you need to figure out ways that you can make more of it without giving yourself more of a headache.

Make sure that you are keeping things in the right perspective. You should try a think about situations that are going to help you with your problems. You can start by trying to avoid situations that are going to make things worse. You have to keep a stable mind so that you are keeping everything in line and not making it more stressful on your life.

Making good choices is another helpful way to deal with the failures of money. You need to try and decide where you can save here and there. Putting money aside or making better choices that are going to give you more options is something that you can do. Thinking about making more money might be another good idea that will help you be more successful in dealing with your failures at money.

Give yourself time. Make sure that you are taking care of yourself and paying attention to your own needs. If you are having bad feelings you should not ignore them. They will not go away on their own if you leave it for another day. You should work through your problems so that you are not left out in the cold when it comes to discouragement. You want to do anything that you can to be a happier and better person. If you are thinking of ways that you can take on the challenges of money you will see how much better off you will be.

There is always time to deal with certain situations later on when you need to. There is no reason to get worked up and stressed out over money. It is really not going to help. The one thing to keep in mind is that you are not a failure and that you have done everything you can to make things better for you and your needs. Give yourself some breathing room and do not be afraid of taking chances. You have to deal with your money problems as they come and realize one thing that you are not failure and that things will improve with time. Just be patient and use your support system well.
Bad Habits in Relationships

April 15, 2018

People often come to relationships with bad habits when it comes to getting along with another person. They may have every intention of making a relationship work, but ingrained trends stop them from truly connecting. There are many such bad habits.

Jealousy plagues many otherwise good relationships. A boyfriend might always suspect his girlfriend of going around with other men. Or, it could be more subtle. A woman may suspect that her husband is constantly looking for another female to take her place. In either case, the jealous person may have nothing real to worry about. This is when it gets to be nothing more than a bad habit.

Selective hearing is another problem that becomes a bad habit in relationships. People do not pay attention to each other’s needs. One person will try to explain something that is important to them, and the other will say, “yes, yes,” but will not really hear.

Then, when the first person says something the second person is interested in, suddenly they are in the conversation completely. This fosters feelings of hostility, and is one of the relationship bad habits that can wear a couple down over time.

People can develop bad habits in long relationships if they lean too much on the other person. They can depend so much on the other person that they lose the ability to take care of themselves. A person in a relationship may become irresponsible at work because of it. They may feel that they are taken care of anyway, so it does not matter. These bad habits can take over every aspect of their lives.

Some couples fall into bad habits in their fighting. All healthy couples will disagree from time to time. Where bad habits come in is the way the arguments are conducted. One partner may have the bad habit of yelling at the top of her lungs.

Another partner may throw dishes instead. Still another may bring up old arguments to try to hurt the other person. All these are bad habits in relationships because they are not productive forms of disagreement.

Many people in relationships get into the bad habits of nagging their partners. This has often been portrayed as a women’s fault. However, men do it too. Sometimes, both parties in the relationship will nag each other. That makes for a very unhealthy relationship.

Blaming comes with its own price. This is a bad habit that erodes a relationship if it goes on too long. One person may be taking all the blame. In this case, that person’s self esteem can get to a very low point.

Other times, people can blame each other. If this happens, the usual result is a disconnect between the two partners. They do not want to be involved with someone who does not accept responsibility.

If you want to have a healthy relationship, you need to purge yourself of your bad habits. The sooner you learn what you and your partner need to stay together, the better your bond will be.
Confessions of a Mind Control Victim

April 14, 2018

Take a look at this video and figure out what you think happened.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i0-0Zevp47k

The ability to do this to someone comes from The NLP Convincer Strategy. This simply means that for most people they only require a few pieces of evidence to be convinced and when that happens, by Gawd, they are convinced.

In fact there is no doubt in their mind. You can’t really blame the poor guy. The scammers just used his own mind against him.

It’s the process that makes scamming smart people so easy. When the smart people are smug and condescending it makes if fun too.
Being Slow? It’s a Go!

April 13, 2018

Brandon had always been thought of as “slow.” He talked slowly; he walked slowly; he read slowly and he ate slowly. He was a nine-year-old boy in fourth grade. Many of Brandon’s classmates made fun of him because he could not process information quickly.

“Mom, I don’t mean to be so slow,” he told his Mother. “I know, sweetheart,” she always replied to him. “You remember the story of The Tortoise and the Hare, don’t you?” “Yes. It’s one of my favorite stories because the tortoise reminds me of me.” “That’s right. Being slow and deliberate can have a tremendous advantage. Sweetheart, you’re gonna find something that you really like to do that suits you that other people will value. Mark my word.” “Are you sure, Mom? I’m tired of being thought of as ‘slo-mo.’” “Slo-mo is a no-go. That name will go away sooner than you think.” Brandon began to speak. “Just trust me on this, son,” his Mom interrupted. “Moms know these kinds of things.” “Alright, Mom.”

The next day, Brandon excitedly came home with a flyer about a soapbox derby event to be held at the local park. “Mom!” yelled Brandon. “What’s all the fuss about, honey?” she replied. “You were right!” “About what?” “The thing you said about something I really like to do.” Brandon showed his Mother the flyer. She read aloud, “1st annual soap-box derby. Prizes for the top three cars.” Brandon was too excited to let her finish. “Mom, you know how much I like to build things. Look at all those model cars in my room. I can design one of the cars for the race. Joey could drive it. He’s one of the best athletes in the school. And he’s my best friend.” “Okay. Here’s the deal,” she said seriously. “Dad and I will get you all of the parts you need. The only condition is that you tell no one – not even Joey – about your car-building, okay? The only one I AM gonna tell is Mr. Washington.” “The principal?” “Yes!” “Why, Mom?” “Just trust your Mom. Have I ever steered you wrong before? Pun intended,” Brandon’s Mom giggled. “Mom! Alright.”

Brandon worked tirelessly on the soapbox car while his Dad took many pictures of all the stages from Brandon designing the car to the finished product. Brandon basically did all of the designing and constructing. In spite of Brandon staying up past his bedtime during most of the schoolnights, his Mother was happy that he was doing something that her son loved. After about three to four weeks, Brandon was finished constructing the car.

On race day, Brandon’s friend, Joey, drove the car that Brandon built without knowing that Brandon himself built the car. It was an easy victory for Joey because of the car’s streamlining and precision. The race sponsors announced that Joey and Brandon were the championship team. Joey was not surprised because he knew Brandon’s capabilities. But the other kids were in shock.

“This is the best car in the school,” said one of the kids. “Yeah,” said another kid. “Look at all of the details and the contours. This car was made to be the fastest.” “How could Brandon Tyler have built this car?” asked another. “He couldn’t do anything quickly and finish by the end of the day to save his life.” “He didn’t finish by the end of the day,” interjected Mr. Washington. “It took him several weeks. Being slow and deliberate has its advantages. Could ANY of you have done all of the precision work and detailing of this car without going crazy?” “No,” the boys said in harmony. Mr. Washington had a photo album, which had the photos of all of the stages of Brandon’s car construction taken by his Father. He showed the boys, who were flabbergasted. Brandon’s Mother came up to her son and gave him a big kiss. “Aw, Mom!” said Brandon regretfully. “Never you mind, mister. I earned that kiss. What did your Mother tell you?” “Your Mother’s right, son,” said Brandon’s Dad. “Everyone has talents to offer the world.” “Well alright,” affirmed Mr. Washington. “’The slowest boy in the school’ created the fastest car in the school. How’s that for irony?”
Bad Habits Can Be Expensive

April 12, 2018

Bad habits can be very expensive to maintain. Never mind that they are annoying to others. Do not think about the pain you cause yourself, if you do not want to. Just remember that your bad habits are hitting you where it hurts-in your wallet.

Smoking has always been a bad habit to have. In past times, people smoked more cigarettes, but cigarettes were cheaper. Now, many people have cut down on the number of cigarettes they smoke per day. Yet, those few are more expensive now than the many were back then. That’s accounting for inflation, too.

This is because lawmakers have seen fit to put large taxes on cigarettes. In many areas, the taxes are set to go up even higher. Some states are planning hikes of $10 per carton. If that will not stop you from smoking, what will?

Alcohol, too, is a bad habit that is subject to sin tax. It depends on how expensive your taste in alcohol is whether it will cost you more or less. Usually, most people will go to drinking less expensive alcohol as their dependency grows. However, it is not unusual for someone to go to a bar on a Friday night and spend their paycheck on alcohol.

Many people get into bad habits of taking prescription drugs when they have an injury, such as a back injury. They may be given muscle relaxants and strong pain relievers to get them through the first painful days. This is a reasonable medical response to their condition.

Yet, the medication helps them feel so good that they will want to get more. They may go back to the doctor to get more. If the doctor will not agree, they may go to different doctors to get different prescriptions. All these doctor visits and prescriptions usually come with a price tag. Then, when that no longer works, they will go to get their pain relief medications on the streets. It will cost even more to keep up their bad habits.

Of course, people who have bad habits with illegal drugs probably have some of the most expensive bad habits of all. Whether it is cocaine, heroin, marijuana, or methamphetamine, there are no cheap drugs. At least, there will not be an unlimited supply of cheap drugs. If a person truly has a bad habit with one of these drugs, they will always want more until they quit. The cost can get to be astronomical.

Gambling can lead people into financial hardship. Some people have such bad habits with gambling that they lose their houses and everything else they own. They may be in staggering debt on top of that. Now that there is online gambling, they cannot even get away from their bad habits by staying home.

Shopaholics spend money like there is no tomorrow. This bad habit can destroy a budget. It can take money away from things that need to be paid, like a mortgage or car payment.

It is clear that these bad habits are costly in the short run. Many of them are also costly over time, as health issues settle in. The cost of cigarettes is high, for example, but the cost of lung cancer is very much higher. Ridding yourself of these bad habits can only help your finances to get better.
Are You Living The Successful Life You Want Or Something Else?

April 11, 2018

Have you wondered why you continue with life as usual, even though you are not experiencing enough happiness, and you know you want things to be different?

Your full happiness and satisfaction with life is largely based on the natural expression of yourself.

That’s great you say, so why does it seem so hard to set up my life to fully express myself the way I really want?

There are some also very natural and normal aspects of you that tend to block change. We all have the ability to change, as we desire, it’s just that we succumb to the ‘forces’ within us that seem to want things to stay as they are.

A large reason for being stuck in place, suffering from anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and stress is that you do not fully understand what you are up against and how to deal with it.

Here are some of the main factors keeping you where you are.

1. Already A Success

First we need to establish that you actually are completely successful right now whether you feel like it or not. You are always successful at living; your current life experience is clear evidence of this.

Your life experience is the result of your thoughts and actions, and you are actually always thinking and doing something. Even if you call it nothing!

And every thought and action has a result, an outcome that is its evidence.

The question is, are you totally successful at the life you really want?

If not, how can you be?

The key here is to discover new thinking and behaviors that provide the outcomes you want, and replace them for what you are doing now.

You can read about what could produce the results you want, but one of the most effective ways is to model what has proven to work for others.

2. Blocking Change

Another important point to clarify is this; everything that exists is always in motion, constantly changing, and this should include you and I. But we seem to want the opposite, for everything to remain as much that same as possible.

Plus, there is a part of our natural human thought that wants to protect us and keep us safe from any form of displeasure and even disruption. This is what most call the ego, that part of our mind that helps protect our fragile self concept, our feeling, and the picture the ego holds of us.

This ego also comes into play when you are trying to change something about yourself which it senses as uncomfortable because it is unknown or may disrupt the habits already established. The ego doesn’t want you to feel uncomfortable.

How can you override, go around or through the ego to make the changes you desire.

With this you will need to take command of your thinking manually yourself. Your ego has had free range up to this point, so expect the possibility some mental and emotional resistance.

Developing strong deeply seated compelling reasons for the changes, you will find the drive to persist as you are taking command from your ego.

When you find examples of what is effective for others you gain a confidence that bolsters your determination. It’s feels more definite knowing that what you are attempting at least has worked for others.

3. Once A Body Is In Motion . . .

Science tells us it is likely to keep in motion.

You keep doing the same things you have always done because that’s what you know how to do.

Your thought patterns, how you perceive things, and how you interpret things is all the product of years of gradual accumulation, one piece building upon another.

All that you have accumulated in your mind from your experiences is what you know, and it’s the basis of all your thought and action.

So it’s easy to see how you will likely keep operating from the same basis as you always have, because that’s what you know and what you are mentally and emotionally comfortable with.

And yes, even if you really want some things to be different, your mind will automatically keep using your history to shape your future.

It’s a lot like a mile long train barreling down the tracks at 60 miles an hour. Once it’s moving it’s hard to stop and it’s staying on the track that’s already been laid!

You will need to discover and implement new habits that better serve your desired outcomes. The tough part of this is that you will tend to keep filtering everything through your existing perceptions. This makes it tough to figure out exactly what to do when it includes things you are not familiar and experienced with.

A powerful method for determining exactly what to do is to copy people who are already successful. This way you are not stuck trying to figure it all out on your own, using only the experience and ‘tools’ you have accumulated.

4. Repeating Habits

Everything you think and do is based on habit, you can label it good or bad, but it is habitual.

If you do nothing to these self-perpetuating habits that you have accumulated, they will just keep on going and get stronger and stronger.

Habits are just a series of thoughts and actions that are tied together and automatically played like a computer program triggered by specific related circumstance.

It is normal for most people to allow them to run automatically, life would be far more complex if we always made new decisions each time something came up.

However, we usually have allowed many things to habitually occur that we are not even aware of, or think we can change.

Here the big question becomes what should you change to, when you want something different than what you now experience?

Further, you may question the validity of what you think up for new habits, as to whether they are worth your efforts and will reveal the results you want.

The example of others is the most straightforward way to find actions that have desirable results. This is how you learned most of your current thinking and behavior as you have developed up to this point. You just haven’t consciously chosen much of it.

You can determine what to actually do by looking at the desirable evidence in the life of someone successful. And now make the conscious choice about what you want in your life.

OK, so you have some ideas about the life you want to live, that’s usually the easy part.

It’s coming up with the new effective thinking and behavior that leads to the results you want that can be tricky. Particularly when all your current habits with your collected body of knowledge and experience supports what you now have, not what you want.

It will take some determination at first to take command of your thinking from your ego as it wants to keep the status quo and is protective of your comfort.

Soften your doubts and fears about change by finding proven thinking, habits and success traits.

Learning from the study of successful people supports your change efforts in a few ways:

· You will have more confidence and determination in pursuing something that you’ve seen work.

· You are not relying only on your existing body of knowledge and experience to create something new.

· Modeling others is the most natural learning method your brain already possesses.

· You now can choose what to model based on specific outcomes.

· Discover things you may not have even thought of yet.

· Fast track your growth progresses.

· Less fear knowing others can and have already done it.

· Quicker to decide and take action on something with proven results.

· Less time wasted on indecisiveness and confusion.

· What to visualize for yourself.

· Increase your self-awareness and motivation.

· Improve your positive attitude and self-confidence.

Think, what if the auto manufacturers had to re-invent the wheel with each year’s new cars?

Why do this with your life, when you can use what others have already discovered and proven!

Existing successful people are your greatest resource for what you can and should be doing on order to live the success you desire.